How was your 2023? Did you come through relatively unscathed? Did you come through better than 2022 and fighting fit for 2024? What are your standout memories, which bits were great for you, and what are the things you just didn’t get quite right? It’s the time of year where people reflect and share their New Year’s resolutions. Why do we do it, what are the origins, why do we often break them, and what could we do instead?
Mashing together what Wikipedia and History.com explain, resolutions are a tradition in which a person resolves to:
- continue good practices
- change an undesired trait or behaviour
- accomplish a personal goal
- or otherwise improve their behaviour at the beginning of a calendar year.
The source of the custom traces back to the ancient Babylonians some 4000 years ago. They were also the first to hold recorded celebrations in honour of the New Year. This was in March when the crops were planted, and they made promises to Gods to do things like return objects they had borrowed and pay their debts. There was a similar practice in Ancient Rome where Caesar changed the calendar such that 1st January marked the beginning of the new year, and people made promises of good conduct for the year ahead.
There are quite varying stats available on the recent success rate of resolutions, some studies suggesting up to a 90% failure rate. I’m not sure on the tracking data behind any of these and haven’t dug deep – but have a think about your own success rates. I don’t believe I’ve ever managed to keep a New Year’s resolution once in my life.
Here’s a quick test:
- Did you make any resolutions last year?
- Can you remember what they were?
- 12 months on – have you kept them all?
- If you answered no to point 3 – what month did you give up?
Why do we seem to fail then? Are they too ambitious? Do we make too many?
Did we just blurt something out on New Year’s Eve or New Year’s Day feeling under pressure? Possibly one or even all might be the case.
Can I propose then that we do away with resolutions all together?
I think it’s completely unrealistic to expect a total behaviour reset just because the clock strikes midnight. The resolutions we need now to cement some real change needs a bit more thought and planning than it probably did 4000 years ago to return a tool or repay a debt.
So, resolve to do something yes, several things if you want to and have scope. But don’t resolve to do all the things immediately on January 1st.
In my blog on 1st December It’s the most wonderful time of the year – to make a plan!
I wrote about learning lessons from a corporate goal setting process and applying them to your own life. A simple two stage thought process:
“How has this year panned out, and what do I want to get done next year?”
Several key differences to resolutions here:
- You can give it a lot more thought
- You don’t have to start it all immediately on 1st Jan
- If you haven’t done it by February it does not mean that you’ve failed
- You’ve got 12 months to get it all done, prioritise in the order you like
- You give yourself breathing space to work out the best way to achieve it
- You can break it down into smaller steps
- You don’t have to share it with anybody, but you can if it works for you!
How to keep yourself on track and accountable?
People respond differently here. If you don’t know what works for you then it might be trial and error to work it out. I’m a fan of a notebook. The book stays close to my desk but I don’t look at it every day, or even every week. The act of writing things down, sketching things out makes them stick in my mind because it reminds me of revising for exams.
Two other useful prompts – make the appointment (Dr, Coach, Financial advisor etc). Pay for the thing (gym session, training course). These prompt me to take the next step of getting it done. If it’s in the diary and I’ve paid upfront then I know I don’t want to let anyone down or lose the money, so essentially, I’m going. The hardest bit is booking the appointment.
Tips from others:
- Write or print out your plan and put it somewhere in your eyeline
- Write a journal
- Use an app to track your progress
- Declare it publicly. Tell everyone what it is that you’re trying to improve/achieve
- Find an accountability partner / mentor / coach.
I’m on with my 2024 plan. It’s a bit light at the moment but I will add to it in the coming months. Doing something different for me starts in early January by going to a networking event (usually an introvert’s nightmare) and experiencing a sound bath (keeping an open mind) with a friend in London. Both are diarised and paid for.
Related reading: It’s the most wonderful time of the year – to make a plan!
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