It was a Sunday just after lunch when my daughter rang me on my mobile. My usual bright and cheery “Hello Darling” was greeted by inaudible gasps for air. I instantly knew what was happening, trying to stay calm and knowing I was about two hours’ drive away from her. I asked how long she had been struggling to breathe and how much reliever she had taken.
Although my 26-year-old daughter had struggled with asthma her whole life and we had all become accustomed to dealing with it, I could instantly tell this was a severe attack. It sounded like she was trying to suck treacle into her lungs, she was understandably very anxious and frightened. I told her to hang up instantly and ring for an ambulance, knowing if they heard her struggling to breathe, they would send help straight away and thank goodness they did! Three doctors and a paramedic arrived within a very short time, although my daughter said afterwards it felt like a lifetime to her. She received immediate treatment and was blue lighted to the specialist hospital.
A few hours later I found myself sat by her bedside in the Resuscitation Unit, tagging out my sister who had kindly dropped everything to be at her side until I could reach her. The air was thick with tension and anxiety, despite all the medication her asthma was still uncontrolled, and she had too much CO2 in her bloodstream. There were discussions of trying one last round of medication and if that didn’t work, she would be put into an induced coma, taking over her breathing with a machine and moving her to the High Dependency Unit. That hour seemed to last forever and as the clock seemed to move very slowly, I sat there feeling helpless. My heart raced with each passing second, the hours in Resus were a rollercoaster of emotions and uncertainty, hope and fear. We were lucky; the skilled medical team managed to stabilize her, as the afternoon turned into the evening and then night, her condition improved, and I was cautiously optimistic.
But it wasn’t just my daughter’s condition that had transformed. The next morning as I sat down to my computer to start my busy Monday morning of back to back calls I had a realisation, something extraordinary had happened to me too. Despite all the chaos and upset of the evening and night before I stepped into a brand-new day with a determination to face the world with a bright, breezy and friendly attitude, and here’s how I did it.
1, Being Grateful
The afternoon, evening and night in Resus had upset me to the core. It also reminded be of the preciousness of life. I felt an overwhelming sense of relief that my daughter had pulled through and was consumed by gratitude for the highly skilled medical staff and their ability to seemingly perform miracles.
2, An Overwhelming Connection to My Friends and Family
I could not put into words how thankful I am that my sister was able to be at my daughter’s side until I could reach her. Having an amazing support network of friends and family, who I can openly share my fears and anxieties with is like a soothing ray of sunshine warming me through.
3, Being my True Self
Working with a great team of people, in an organisation where you can bring your true self to work, I knew I didn’t have to ‘put a brave face on’ and without the pressure of having to act ‘normal’ in the workplace, after experiencing a traumatic experience the day before, I felt both grateful and remarkably at ease. I knew I was in a safe environment where I could reach out for support if I needed it.
4, Setting Small Goals
I started my Monday with small, achievable tasks. Each completed item on my to-do list was a victory, reminding me that I could overcome adversity one step at a time.
5, Embracing Resilience
I realized that resilience isn’t about avoiding difficult situations, but about boldly embracing them and finding an inner strength to navigate through them. Surviving the trauma of the previous day, without breaking down into a blubbering mess, made me realise I am far stronger than I give myself credit for.
6, Positive Mindset
I decided to make Monday a day of spreading positivity. I was bright and cheerful with everyone and despite physically looking like someone who had only had a few hours’ sleep I went on camera for every call and smiled throughout, making positive comments, giving compliments and managed to brighten not only my day, but everyone’s around me.
Throughout the day I felt a huge sense of relief, life had tested me (again) and I felt so proud of myself for responding with resilience. My daughter’s health scare had shown me the depth of my own strength, the power of a positive attitude and was an unexpected reminder that
resilience can be found when we need it most and least expect it.
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